The most important word in the dictionary

No is such a difficult word. It is one of the first few words that we speak as a child, but as we mature, it is rarely spoken. Learning how to say no is such an important skill but it is so difficult for so many people. It is not easy for humans to reject one another because of ‘empathy’. We don’t want to see someone get hurt because of us. We don’t want to contribute to someone else’s pain.

However, it is important to have this skill so we can keep toxicity at bay. Knowing how to reject someone is also a way of protecting ourselves against getting manipulated by people with bad intentions. When they see that you know how to reject others, you are not viewed as a meek sheep who agrees to just about anything.

Here are some tips to make rejecting people easier.

  • Just say it

Sometimes when you are suffering from a specific skin concern, say acne, it is important to go for a quick and fast acne treatment instead of overloading your skin with 500 different types of treatments. Similarly, instead of beating around the bush, being straightforward is the way to go. It might sound harsh, but it is appreciated by people. It saves people’s time and prevents miscommunication. After going one big round, the other party might not have understood you, making the matter worst. Being direct doesn’t have to mean you are a bad person, you are expressing your views and doing the best for yourself at that point in time.

  • Justification

After the rejection, you can justify your reason to the other party. Adding on a justification makes a big difference because then your intentions are clearly expressed, and the other party won’t be left to guess the reasons behind your rejection. Healthy discussions could also arise from this. After many occasions of healthy rejections, the other person will understand the type of person you are, and you would not need to explain yourself that much anymore. This is just like how you only need to go for maintenance facials after your skin is rid of acne issues.

  • Just be selfish

Put yourself first. Chances are, the other party is putting himself first when asking for a favour. There’s nothing wrong with prioritizing yourself, because if you don’t, who will? (Go get that extra retinol peel if you want it)  I saw a quote that resonated with me, it was “by taking care of myself, I have so much more to offer the world than when I am running on empty.” This is true because if you don’t even take care of yourself (mental health included), how can you expect to give your best to the world?

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